Friday, September 12, 2008

Of taxis and HR, there's a formula to everything~

7 million population in HK. Compared to Singapore thats like 75% more (approx. 4 mil). 24k+ taxis in Singapore compared to 18k+ in HK. There should be more taxis per population in Singapore but I cannot figure out why people say there are more taxis in HK than in SG.... that was before today. I realise they drive like F1 drivers. I've been here for more than 1000 days but only till this morning did I sit up and scan the road ahead while sitting inside the taxi.

You get grandmas walking across the road between junctions at 2mm/hour, no problem because taxi driver uncle will swerve around her, curse and speed away. In Singapore? The taxi driver uncle will curse and wait while the meter jump and jump... 3-lane roads reduced to 1 lane because of fruit baskets, carts, dogs and other creatures? No problem because like Hamilton, the taxi driver will swerve into the lane and speed away. Taxi driver uncle in Singapore? Curse and swear and wait till all the animals reach the farm before moving off.

It is all simple mathematics. Taxis moving create the illusion that there are more taxis on the road. A taxi going around a running track at 40km/hr (SG taxi) will give you 100 laps. Another at 80km (HK taxi) will give you 200 laps. Furthermore I suspect the utilization rate of HK taxis are much higher as compared to those in SG. You see SG taxis parked near the void deck carparks of HDB estates most of the time. There's like thousand or more all over the island at any one point. Don't see that in HK... don't see that alot.

And since we are on the subject of maths, I have another theory on HR in a company. Dumb company employ dumb HR. Dumb HR employs dumb staff. Alot of dumb staff based on looks = the need to employ more staff because they cannot handle their job... which is pretty good for male staff like us because we get to see new pretty girls joining the company from time to time. Problem : They are a liability. Some don't even know how to use excel or print a document.

So why did HR employ them? Based on what criteria did they employ them? Usually looks. Seems like qualification and experience means nothing to those lecherous HR people. I'm fine with that, as long as they don't come and bother me with

So here goes my forumla :

i) Dumb Company = Dumb HR

ii) Dumb HR = Dumb Staff

iii) Dumb Staff = Need to employ more as compared to a staff with >= decent qualification + intelligience (ratio 2:1)

iv) Dumb Staff = More stress and anger for staff with >= decent qualification + intelligience

v) (Need to employ more as compared to a staff with >= decent qualification + intelligience) + (More stress and anger for staff with >= decent qualification + intelligience) = More decent staff will quit the company

vi) More decent staff will quit the company = Dumb HR need to employ more staff

vii) Dumb HR need to employ more staff = More Dumb Staff

viii) From iii), since 1 Decent Staff = 2 Dumb Staff then Dumb HR will need to employ twice as many staff

ix) Dumb HR probably cannot handle the stress = Dumb HR quit and need to employ someone new to takeover

x) Dumb HR probably employ even dumber HR

xi) Dumb Company = (Dumb)² HR

xii) (Dumb)² HR probably employ even dumber Staff

xiii) (Dumb)² HR = 2*(Dumb Staff)

xiv) Therefore, everything being the same (same sales amount, same amount of work), the dumber the HR the more the headcount of a company


f(Dumbⁿ HR) = Number of Staff * n


I love maths~

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